Although there are real and significant safety issues when using the Internet, there's also a tremendous amount of deliberate messaging that fans the flames of fear. This fear mongering is not only inaccurate, it’s harmful. It thwarts meaningful discussions about solutions, it weakens trust in the Internet, and it turns people off from hearing legitimate safety messaging.

Those peddling hysteria focus on the direst examples of online abuse, use shock value stunts, and carefully select which data points they cite so as to sound most alarming. It's as if consumers were trapped in a snow globe and external forces are giving a shake when convenient to give people the impression that there's always a storm.

So why are some groups peddling fear? Four major groups stand to gain by promoting panic.

Companies offering tools to "protect children"

Reputable companies generally refrain from hysteria marketing, but others prey on parental concern to increase revenue. Look at the text in the PC Tattletale ad shown below. (I've added the orange boxes and underlining for emphasis.) "Lurid" and "sensationalized" are the politest descriptors I'd use to describe this marketing approach.

The messaging is trying to scare you into buying the product

Just the names of other products should give you pause, but consider also some of the features marketed as virtues that in fact represent the creepiest side of privacy invasion. IamBigBrother claims to "run in total secrecy, and is very hard to find." SniperSpy software "remotely installs to your computer through e-mail.... SniperSpy fully and completely bypasses the Windows XP Firewall." (And if you think the only people who use these products are good parents tracking troubled teens, think again. Having followed Internet abuses for many years, I can't tell you how many husbands tail wives, children watch parents, business managers shadow employees, and so on.)

Look for products with balanced messaging and transparent safety settings. A good place to start is to compare filtering products on TopTenReviews.

The media

Screaming headlines and sensationalized footage sell better than balanced news. Many media companies are more than happy to make that profit, but it does not usually present an accurate reflection of reality.

Look for balanced reporting that speaks to the whole issue, including the circumstances that can lead to risk, how common the particular risk may be overall , how the victims were exposed, and how to mitigate the risks.

Some Internet safety organizations

Read the material you or your children get from Internet safety organizations.

• Does it use worst-case scenarios and scare tactics or is the content balanced, outlining the risks while providing actionable ways to enjoy the Internet safely?
• Is the material giving a list of rules to follow or is it educating you so that you can apply your own family's values and consider the maturity of family members to create your own guidelines?
• What is the expertise of the source and who is sponsoring the content and why? Some groups on the Internet safety bandwagon have very specific agendas and use fear to sway public opinion or get more attention.
• What drives their funding? Some are keenly aware that funding flows more freely when angst is in the air.

Look for organizations with a deep background in Internet technologies, experience teaching consumers, and demonstration of a clear understanding of predatory behavior through their material. Look for international experience as the Internet has no boundaries. Be sure the messaging isn't simply a list of bullet points but actually teaches you how to make informed decisions that match your values and safety requirements.

Companies that want to divert attention from their own shortcomings

It has become abundantly clear that there are safety issues in many of the products and services we use on the Internet, and companies can no longer ignore the warnings that Internet safety technical experts have been giving for years. So what should companies do about it? Acknowledging that their products have blatant safety flaws isn't difficult, but it tends to lead to nasty lawsuits and regulations. (Just ask the tobacco industry.)

Instead, companies use fear as a means to divert attention from flaws in their products or shift blame to people.

• Predators naturally come to the top of this list. They are to blame; they committed the crimes. Just don't point out that fundamental flaws in products enable a great deal of the exploitation.
• Blame the customer, often teens or "irresponsible" parents.
• Announce belated (and often self serving) "reforms" and proclaim your company a hero. Maybe people won't notice that the reforms are a day late and a dollar short.
• When all else fails, whine. Claim that your company should not be faulted because it's doing more than some companies, or there are bigger companies, or worse companies....

Look for companies that understand that to deliver a safer product, they actually have to build a safer product; require adherence to their Terms of Use policies; have abuse reporting links clearly visible on every page and proactive monitoring of abuses on their services instead of relying on offended consumers to notify them of issues; advise consumers up front about potential risks, and how to mitigate those risks through solid Internet safety content that relates to the specifics of their products.

Fear solves nothing, and saves no one. Whenever you hear fear messaging, ask yourself what’s the motivation.

Linda